Ways to Understand Yourself Better

If you want to be an effective leader, it’s going to require you to be more effective in certain behaviors, which often starts with understanding yourself.

Leadership is rooted in accountability, including accountability to yourself and your actions. To unlock your personal potential to be a leader, you need to accept where you are today to get to where you want to be tomorrow.

Here are the steps I recommend taking to better understand yourself as a leader and, importantly, as a human being:

1. Look in the mirror.

Honesty is an integral component of personal growth. You don’t have to literally look into a mirror for this exercise, but take some time to ask yourself these questions:

• What is going well?

• What am I doing to be accountable for what’s going well?

• What behaviors am I utilizing for what’s going well?

• What’s not going well?

• How am I taking responsibility for what’s not going well?

• What behaviors are contributing to what’s not going well?

This might not be easy at first. Self-accountability is challenging and requires accepting your feelings, behaviors, and the reality of your circumstances to make a change.

2. Get feedback.

Once you’ve been honest with yourself, you’ll want to get direct feedback from others.

I recommend identifying people you trust, personally and professionally, and asking them to answer the following questions about you:

• What are my biggest strengths?

• What do you think makes me great?

• What could I change that gets in the way of me being more successful or effective in my life?

Remember: Feedback is a gift. It helps you develop self-awareness. The responses you receive will help you better understand how you impact others.

3. Become comfortable with emotions.

There’s a misconception that feelings and vulnerability are a weakness in leadership. In my work, I’ve found that feelings are a strategic advantage. Feelings can help drive connections with others and help you personally identify who you are right now to see where you want to go.

Acknowledging your emotions can help you better lead yourself and others. Let your internal walls down, and over time you will unlock insight into yourself and your perspective.